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Faith and Truth

After removing the roots and praying for healing, now we must take actions to “secure the beachhead” of freedom that we have established. We can count on the devil testing us to see if we are in fact free.

The first area he will test us in is our faith, because faith is the means by which we withstand his attacks. In 1 Corinthians 16:13 NKJV Paul wrote, “Watch, stand fast in the faith, be brave, be strong.” Faith also composes a key piece of our spiritual armor, the shield of faith, which we are to use to “extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one” (Ephesians 6:16 NIV).

The devil’s strategy to weaken our faith is to bombard us with lies. If we believe the lies, our shield of faith will be weakened because it is no longer based on truth, and the devil’s arrows will get through. To repel an attack on our faith we must use the truth that destroys the lies. This is why it is crucial that we get into the Bible at least once a day (typically in a “quiet time”) to learn the truth that sets us free (John 8:31-32). Knowing God’s word will also build our faith up (Romans 10:17).

A great way to learn the scriptures and thereby apply Truth to everyday situations is to memorize Bible verses.  With the verses in your mind, you won’t have to flip through your Bible at the moment of temptation, looking for a verse to use. Jesus demonstrated this “spiritual warfare” strategy when he faced the devil in the wilderness temptations (Luke 4).  Jesus responded to every temptation by quoting the scripture that refuted the devil’s lies.

Here is a simple system for memorizing Bible verses that worked for me when I first started walking free of sex addiction:  During my quiet times I wrote out the verses that were meaningful to me on 3 x 5 note cards. I reviewed those verses during the week while exercising, waiting for appointments, sitting in traffic and other idle times. Once I memorized 12 verses, I started a new group.  Periodically I would go back through all the groups of verses to refresh my memory.  With today’s technologies, there’s probably an Ap for capturing and reviewing verses, however I found that the process of writing the verses out was helpful for memorization.   If you don’t want to go to the trouble of making note cards, you could try an off the shelf product like The Topical Memory System, published by the Navigators. While it is not specifically focused on sex addiction issues, it is great for all around Christian living.

Making the effort to memorize key verses will pay off. I found that the Holy Spirit will remind me of my memory verses throughout the day, particularly when I’m being tempted. Having the verses in mind also helps me keep my thoughts trained on God instead of carnal things.

To illustrate how to use the verses, here are some examples of using verses to refute lies the devil uses:

“You haven’t changed…you’re not really free…it’s just a matter of time before you fall”

Reply: “The scripture says, ‘If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!’ I am a new creation and I am free because Jesus has set me free from the law of sin and death” (refs: 2 Corinthians 5:17 & John 8:31-32)

“God doesn’t care about you and he won’t provide for your sexual needs”

Reply: “The scripture says that God ‘Himself bore our sins in his body on the tree that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.’ God cares so much for me that he sacrificed his only Son for my sake. He will provide for all my needs! The scripture also says, ‘But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.'” (Refs: 1 Peter 2:24 & Matthew 6:33 NIV)

“It’s impossible to live without masturbating”

Reply: “The scripture says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ My old self was crucified with Christ and it is no longer I who lives but Christ who lives in me. I CAN live without masturbation and Jesus will help me do so.” (Galatians 2:20; Philippians 4:13 NKJV)

“The Holy Spirit is not really living in you and he won’t help you”

Reply: “The scripture says that the same Spirit who raised Christ from the dead gives life to my mortal body. The Holy Spirit enables me to put the sinful deeds of my body to death.” (Refs: Romans 8:11,13)

“God won’t provide a way out of temptation for you”

Reply: “The scripture says that God is faithful and just and will provide a way out of the temptation so that I can stand up under it.” (Ref: 1 Corinthians 10:13)

Triggers

The second area that devil will test us in is the old patterns or “triggers” of temptation that used to lead us to sin. These will obviously vary from person to person, and usually will relate in some way to the roots we examined in the previous section of this study. For example, some of typical triggers for masturbation can be:

Stress/Fear/Rejection/Loneliness
Taking long showers
Watching late night TV/videos with sexual themes or inuendo
People-watching
Surfing the internet when alone
Looking at porn (obviously)
Sensual contact with girlfriend/boyfriend
Fetishes
Dwelling on sexual memories
Take a moment to ask God to show you what your particular triggers have been for masturbation and write them down:

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

When we respond to a trigger and move toward acting out, we’ll find it’s easy to go back down the old familiar road of temptation and follow through with masturbation. What we need to do is determine a new plan of action on how we will now respond to a trigger when we encounter it. God gives us several options for how to respond, including:

I think its important to note that the goal here is not simply to control our behavior patterns – it is to live as a truly changed person.  We need God’s power to change our hearts so that we want to stop doing the things that keep us in bondage to sin.  With the multiple possible sources of temptation in our world, we are going to need God-inspired self control to make right choices each day.

With that in mind, assuming that we are asking Jesus daily to fill us with the Holy Spirit and help us walk as a changed person, here are some examples of possible actions to take in response to temptation-triggers:

Stress/Fear/Rejection/Loneliness: Run to Jesus through prayer on the spot instead of running to masturbation to medicate yourself; remind yourself of key verses that address the trigger (e.g. fear (Romans 8:15; 1 Peter 5:7); loneliness (John 14:18; Matthew 28:20); Rejection (Romans 8:15-16); Stress (1 Peter 5:7))
Taking long showers: Take “navy showers,” i.e. get the scrubbing done and get out; you could also set a timer or take a colder shower than normal; play praise and worship music in the background to get your thoughts focused heavenward.
Watching late night TV/videos with sexual themes: Set an early time you will turn devices off by each night and stick to it. Use the time you would have spent watching TV to do something meaningful (spend time with family, pray, worship, read the Bible, etc.).
People-watching:  Change your location or bring something else to do. Force your eyes to look elsewhere if you find yourself lusting after people.  Don’t let your eyes and thoughts dwell on the temptation! (see train eyes for more)
Surfing the internet when alone: Don’t get on a device unless someone is there nearby. If you know you’ll be home alone, don’t even turn the device on. Plan something to do in place of surfing the net.
Looking at porn: Take whatever drastic measures you can to stop the input of porn images. If it means installing a filter, or moving your computer to a common area, or even getting rid of your computer temporarily, do it!
Sensual contact with girlfriend/boyfriend: Ask your friend to help you by joining you in committing your relationship and activities to God. Agree in prayer together to not cross the boundaries that will cause sexual arousal. (e.g. long kissing, sleeping together, heavy petting, mutual masturbation, watching movies w/sex scenes, etc. ). Take steps ahead of time to avoid placing yourselves in tempting situations.
Fetishes: Get rid of any object you have been using as a fetish. Confess your idolatry and pray that God will cut you free from the unhealthy attachment you have to the fetishes. Also, ask the Lord to break any demonic power involved with the fetish and the hold it may have on you. Force your mind and eyes off any fetish-related thing that causes you to fantasize.
Dwelling on sexual memories: Whenever you catch yourself reminiscing about your sexual memories, start pleading the “blood of Jesus” over the memory. Follow this by forcing your thoughts onto a wholesome topic (see control thoughts).

Now, for your particular triggers from the previous section, brainstorm on actions you can take to break the pattern for each one and write them down below:

 

 

 

 

Take a moment to declare to yourself and the Lord in faith that you have the power to choose differently and break the patterns that have plagued you in the past. You can pray:

“Heavenly Father, I am a new creation in Christ and the life that I live now I live by faith in God, who loved me and gave himself up for me. The Holy Spirit lives in me and is strengthening me now to live as the truly changed person that I am in Christ. I have the power through Christ who strengthens me to break my old trigger patterns of masturbation. I commit myself to breaking the trigger patterns. Father, please strengthen my conviction to reject any trigger that I may encounter. Please sharpen my conscience and passion for purity. Thank you, Father! In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.”

Finally, back up the commitment you just made by sharing it with a trusted friend, accountability partner or pastor who will agree with you in prayer and encourage you in keeping your commitment over the coming months.

Next page: Masturbation Study Wrap-up